Russ has all the attributes of a complete cock. However, despite annoying the crap out of ya his glistening gum smile makes it impossible to hate him.
Russ can play pretty much anywhere. The bedroom, the garden, the airing cupboard, he's not fussy.
With the touch of a talented rapist, Russ is a danger both in defence, attack and most notably the nightclub. Above all, no matter what, Russ will score!
Russ enjoys cricket, wavey-hands dancing and cheeking fat birds.
Awww what a nice lad!!!
His name is Scooby, Scooby, faster than lightning. Quicker than a freshly greased dutchman, one minute you see him the next he is rolling around on the floor in agony.
Famous for his Dale Winton perma-tan and loveable nature, Scoob has a shot on him powerful enough to kill a new born baby. Not that he would of course. He'd cuddle it. Scoob's lovely.
The only time he won't help ya is if your trapped in a runaway hot air balloon. Beg as you might, he won't help. Doesn't wanna let ya down...
Cute and cuddly like a teddy bear, Pughy spends much of his time tucking his mums tits into her socks.
As midfield playmaker Pughy holds the key to Legia Walsall success, with the ability to produce a goal out of nothing.
A lover of quick one-two's and silky touches, Pughy's is Legia Walsall's answer to Georgi Kinkladze. Overall a really good player, and he fucking should be the amount of time he spends playing football the sad twat.
Pughy enjoys fixing taps and chasing young girls with no pubic hair.
Dave is a horrible, foul-mouthed nutcase that gives abuse to all those around him.
Playing in midfield, Dave has the potential to cause havoc and will most certainly do all he can to achieve it.
With a long range shot almost as deadly as his dreaded "poo finger" attack on opposition players, Dave is most definately a player you want playing with you rather than against you.
Daves hobbies include smoking and calling his missus a " big fat smelly twat." What a pleasant young man.
Toddy is both co-founder and defensive maestro. Despite often being lumbered with bigger opponents Toddy holds his own against just about anyone. In fact he's a bit like Chlamidea, you just can't shake the bastard off!
Sporting a vast range of suicidal "John Terry style" blocks Todd is vital not only for the team but for Nev's health in general.
Like Nev, Todd left Perry Barcelona in the summer having been run ragged for 9 months in the club's dismal relegation battle.
Todd is from Reading, a nice town. Lucky bastard!
Both Co-founder and goalkeeper, Nev is looking forward to a quieter season in goal for Legia Walsall.
Having been used as cannon fodder for opposition sides whilst playing for Perry Barcelona, Nev hopes that having a talented team infront him will limit his potential bruising in the coming season.
Boasting an unorthodox "just get in the fucking way" goalkeeping style, Nev uses just about any part of his body to try and stop the ball.
Nev enjoys crumpets and long walks on the beach.
